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Post by Karma_Kramer on May 26, 2021 1:21:12 GMT
An aspiring chef, working in an upscale restaurant, tries to cook a bunch of calzones using ingredients that are well past their use date. But he's arrogant, he's brash. He figures if he uses just the right spices, cooks them long enough, they'll turn out fine. But he goes too far. He over seasons them and makes everyone violently ill.
Cue slow motion shot of all the customers in the restaurant keeling over, retching and screaming to the soundtrack of Adagio For Strings by Samuel Barber
Afterwards the chef doesn't want to go anywhere near a kitchen ever again, until a good friend enlists his help to cook a bunch of kosher calzones for a jewish singles night they're organizing. He refuses at first, but the friend successfully talks him into it. The calzones end up being a huge success and are loved by all. The chef proudly exclaims "I'm back baby!!!" while triumphantly pumping his fists in the air.
Freeze-frame and roll credits to an upbeat pop song playing.
There's a movie, that's a movie!
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Post by nutsberryfarm ⛑ on Jul 12, 2021 0:14:29 GMT
An aspiring chef, working in an upscale restaurant, tries to cook a bunch of calzones using ingredients that are well past their use date. But he's arrogant, he's brash. He figures if he uses just the right spices, cooks them long enough, they'll turn out fine. But he goes too far. He over seasons them and makes everyone violently ill.
Cue slow motion shot of all the customers in the restaurant keeling over, retching and screaming to the soundtrack of Adagio For Strings by Samuel Barber
Afterwards the chef doesn't want to go anywhere near a kitchen ever again, until a good friend enlists his help to cook a bunch of kosher calzones for a jewish singles night they're organizing. He refuses at first, but the friend successfully talks him into it. The calzones end up being a huge success and are loved by all. The chef proudly exclaims "I'm back baby!!!" while triumphantly pumping his fists in the air.
Freeze-frame and roll credits to an upbeat pop song playing.
There's a movie, that's a movie!
Yes!
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Post by Karma_Kramer on Feb 16, 2023 1:23:13 GMT
How about a "My Dinner with Andre" sequel. Except they have dinner over Skype this time.
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Feb 17, 2023 22:08:00 GMT
How about a "My Dinner with Andre" sequel. Except they have dinner over Skype this time. Even better, a "My Dinner With rhs6358". Chosen members of the board are welcomed to a delicious feast at the rhs ranch and get involved in stimulating conversation. Karma_Kramer: Meaning? I throw on some chicken nuggets and we talk about girls.
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Post by Karma_Kramer on Feb 17, 2023 22:12:40 GMT
How about a "My Dinner with Andre" sequel. Except they have dinner over Skype this time. Even better, a "My Dinner With rhs6358". Chosen members of the board are welcomed to a delicious feast at the rhs ranch and get involved in stimulating conversation. Karma_Kramer: Meaning? I throw on some chicken nuggets and we talk about girls. We need to to find Hawkeye so he can be a part of this, just to hear him say "throw a shrimp on the barbie, mate" in his Aussie accent.
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Feb 17, 2023 22:16:53 GMT
Even better, a "My Dinner With rhs6358". Chosen members of the board are welcomed to a delicious feast at the rhs ranch and get involved in stimulating conversation. Karma_Kramer: Meaning? I throw on some chicken nuggets and we talk about girls. We need to to find Hawkeye so he can be a part of this, just to hear him say "throw a shrimp on the barbie, mate" in his Aussie accent. Hawkeye (panicking): What should I do? I'm from Minneapolis.
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Post by Karma_Kramer on Feb 17, 2023 22:51:07 GMT
We need to to find Hawkeye so he can be a part of this, just to hear him say "throw a shrimp on the barbie, mate" in his Aussie accent. Hawkeye (panicking): What should I do? I'm from Minneapolis. As an added plot twist, Nuts turns into a werewolf because it's a full moon.
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Feb 17, 2023 22:55:54 GMT
Hawkeye (panicking): What should I do? I'm from Minneapolis. As an added plot twist, Nuts turns into a werewolf because it's a full moon. Well, he always said "i love moon!".
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Post by nutsberryfarm ⛑ on Feb 19, 2023 16:54:29 GMT
As an added plot twist, Nuts turns into a werewolf because it's a full moon. Well, he always said "i love moon!". Do I have to?
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Post by pizzabagel on Feb 19, 2023 17:17:54 GMT
Well, he always said "i love moon!". Do I have to? Yes, it's in your contract. Now say it like you mean it.
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Feb 19, 2023 17:31:13 GMT
Well, he always said "i love moon!". Do I have to? You can say "hats!" if you want, but it won't be as powerful.
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Feb 19, 2023 17:31:47 GMT
Yes, it's in your contract. Now say it like you mean it. nuts has a contract? You're kidding. All this time and I never knew that. Where's my contract?
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Post by nutsberryfarm ⛑ on Feb 24, 2023 20:29:12 GMT
Movie time!
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Post by Karma_Kramer on Apr 22, 2023 5:49:22 GMT
Attack of the Killer Cotton Candy at the local Fair.
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Apr 22, 2023 10:36:29 GMT
Attack of the Killer Cotton Candy at the local Fair. Is this your film? Does it have girls' bum bums in it? I'll go if I can see girls' bum bums. Karma_Kramer: No. No nudity at all. Then I'll just sit there. With my eyes closed.
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Post by Karma_Kramer on Apr 23, 2023 20:37:00 GMT
Will Ferrell is Bionic Man!
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Apr 23, 2023 21:17:04 GMT
Will Ferrell is Bionic Man! And Jack Carter is Joey Birney
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Post by Karma_Kramer on Apr 24, 2023 23:00:34 GMT
Are you telling us a top hollywood producer read a script to you? or they read your script to themself.
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Post by Karma_Kramer on Jul 18, 2023 20:04:31 GMT
The Nutty Calzone Chef!
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Post by nutsberryfarm ⛑ on Jul 20, 2023 2:40:55 GMT
Are you telling us a top hollywood producer read a script to you? or they read your script to themself. 😀
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Post by rudiger on Jul 20, 2023 4:04:15 GMT
Is that the one where you can only buy a ticket with a bag of pennies?
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Jul 20, 2023 8:57:14 GMT
Is that the one where you can only buy a ticket with a bag of pennies? No, it was a sequel to the film "The Bellboy". Jerry Lewis played the owner of a pizzeria. He has no dialogue. He just makes faces and has wacky encounters with customers. Until the end, when a customer asks him why his calzone looks like a danish and Lewis says his only line "I thought that was a calzone". Roll credits.
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Post by rudiger on Jul 20, 2023 13:36:43 GMT
Is that the one where you can only buy a ticket with a bag of pennies? No, it was a sequel to the film "The Bellboy". Jerry Lewis played the owner of a pizzeria. He has no dialogue. He just makes faces and has wacky encounters with customers. Until the end, when a customer asks him why his calzone looks like a danish and Lewis says his only line "I thought that was a calzone". Roll credits. A calzone/danish? Ooh, I like this idea.
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Jul 20, 2023 14:53:56 GMT
No, it was a sequel to the film "The Bellboy". Jerry Lewis played the owner of a pizzeria. He has no dialogue. He just makes faces and has wacky encounters with customers. Until the end, when a customer asks him why his calzone looks like a danish and Lewis says his only line "I thought that was a calzone". Roll credits. A calzone/danish? Ooh, I like this idea. The best part is when Robert Emhardt slips on a danish, falls on the floor and splits his pants. Revealing no underwear. Just pure Emhardt. Audiences are repulsed and file out of the theater.
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Post by rudiger on Jul 20, 2023 16:56:10 GMT
A calzone/danish? Ooh, I like this idea. The best part is when Robert Emhardt slips on a danish, falls on the floor and splits his pants. Revealing no underwear. Just pure Emhardt. Audiences are repulsed and file out of the theater. I prefer the sequence when Jerry Lewis performs his 'The Typewriter' bit on a pizza. You just can't comedy like that nowadays.
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rhs6358
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Post by rhs6358 on Jul 20, 2023 17:08:02 GMT
The best part is when Robert Emhardt slips on a danish, falls on the floor and splits his pants. Revealing no underwear. Just pure Emhardt. Audiences are repulsed and file out of the theater. I prefer the sequence when Jerry Lewis performs his 'The Typewriter' bit on a pizza. You just can't comedy like that nowadays. So the pizza was the typewriter or Jerry inserted a pizza into the roller like a sheet of paper? rudiger: Yes.
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